Sunday, January 13, 2008

Marvin Bloom Hot & Bothered

Marvin Bloom returned safe and sound to the secure shores of the USA and soon after e-mailed a video file he wanted me to upload for him. I was sick with a stomach virus for a few days, so got delayed, and then I received a flurry of frantic e-mails from Marvin. I tried to explain that I was ill and most likely under attack by the devil (something that I thought he would appreciate), but he claimed that Satan won't mess with me since, like Joe G., I am backslidden. He then accused me of kissing too many Swedish men. As if I were that lucky.

In this video Marvin recounts yet another bizarre incident that occurred during his brief stay in Sweden. I was off having a normal fika with a new friend when Noa and Alex lured Marvin into a sauna with a pack of other hot naked Swedes. Needless to say this sorely tested Marvin's ex-gay convictions.

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At 8:38 AM , Blogger Willie Hewes said...

Wait, wait, you were talking about your penis with a bunch of hot, Swedish men while you were all naked, but you're worried about the bathroom stalls in Amsterdam Airport?


I don't really know what to say to that.

At 1:48 PM , Blogger Vincent Cervantes said...

you must of felt like Paul in Romans 1. You poor thing! That is beyond terrible!

Lord shed the blood of Jesus over that debauchery!!

Rico will investigate!

At 12:06 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Marvin, I'm sure the real reason people were staring at your penis was because it was not pointed down towards the floor...

At 7:24 AM , Blogger Joe G. said...

Omigod - "unbidden". Ha!

I'm surprised that you didn't explain that, like our Lord and Savior, you are circumcised - unlike all of those Swedish men who lost their faith so long ago...

If you ever want to show how God has surely blessed you "down there", you can always upload a video of it on one of those Sex-Tube sites.

Did you wear the wig and sun glasses during the fika? I still think your look has a certain mod, heroin chic to it.

At 5:38 PM , Blogger kurt_t said...

Funny you should mention that Marvin, because I've always wondered why the ex-gay milieu isn't more interested in the issue of circumcision.

I mean, think about it. If the root cause of gayness is a perceived deficit in the area of masculine characteristics, wouldn't you have a vested interest in preserving foreskins?

In other words, according to the ex-gay worldview, isn't there a risk that a boy without a foreskin would look at his buddy who has a foreskin and say "Oh, I don't have one of those. I'm not manly enough. I'm going to seek out this deficit in my manliness through sex with other men."?

I'm honestly curious about why this discussion doesn't happen in ex-gay circles.

Oh, and about Larry Craig. That was a little catty, Marvin. I think you might be under the influence of an unclean spirit of cattiness. I'll light a candle for you, but it's going to have to wait until Sunday. No way can I make it to a weekday mass the way this week is going.

At 1:37 PM , Blogger KJ said...

Naked Swedish men in a sauna?

A live Jewish penis?

I think I'm under attack from unbidden images.


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